487 – Idle hands

The shoulder shell is back! Truth is, I missed drawing it and even though I designed them, I ended up REALLY not liking the new spaulders. This entire strip seems like it’s tailor-made to have Yakkity Sax played in the background. Now all we need is Benny Hill coming over the next sand dune… Also, […]

491 – Sore Thumb

Annnnnd the hiatus is over! Man, this move took FOREVER. You never realize just how much junk you have until you have to pack it all up and move it. Especially when you have twins, which means you have duplicates of darn near everything! Ugh. Anyway, thanks for your patience, folks. _ Strangely, paladins tend […]

492 – Deep Pockets

And now you know where the crew keeps all their gear… and the drawbacks of said. Jaine’s belt pouches are modified Bags of Holding with arcane reinforcement so that sharp objects (like Dhur’s axe or Jaine’s little-used rapier) won’t tear the bag and dump everything into the Astral Plane. Yes, I thought this through. Yes, […]

493 – Gerta Fenquick

I got the D&D Starter Set in the mail last Thursday. Here are my brief impressions: When they say “starter set,” do they mean it. Essentially, the rules are a booklet with the standard explanations of what a roleplaying game is, a rundown on the 6 statistics that make up a character, a combat section, […]

494 – A bunch of prime berks

Warning: the following contains a teensy bit of soul-baring. If that’s not your cup of tea, no problem and I’ll see you next week. For the rest of you, here we go… 1… 2… 3… Okay, full-on honesty time here, folks. As I’m sure some of you have noticed, I have been fighting creative burn-out […]

497 – Better Get Rey-Rey

And now, in a continuing service, an entry from the Encyclopedia Ardrisia. SKULLBALL On the Lower Planes, life is a grueling existence and usually very short. Unrelentingly harsh weather conditions, demonic adversaries and a distinct lack of decent take-out food are among the many things that can make a soul give in to despair. However, […]

498 – Vorp Redux

Yes, my go-to sound effect for trans-dimensional travel is VORP. ____ My copy of the new Player’s Handbook arrived the other day and I have to say, overall, it looks SOOOOOOO much easier to play than 4th Edition. The system itself seems solid and easy to play out of the box, which could not be […]

500 – Scrybl

And now, a special guest blog post from Kathy, Rob’s wife. As you may have noticed, this is Rob’s 500th strip.  As it happens, it’s also the 5-year anniversary of Meatshield.  Both are pretty significant accomplishments!  Rob has worked hard to make Meatshield what it is today.  He has developed likeable characters, engaging storylines, and […]

509 – May I be Excused?

For that last panel, I had this scene from an otherwise forgettable Disney movie bouncing in my head. In The Emperor’s New Groove, a bunch of the villain’s thugs get alchemically transformed into animals. One turns into a cow and says, “Umm, excuse me, I’m a cow, can I go home?” Don’t know why that […]

511 – The Eye of Justice

For those of you in the U.S. who aren’t familiar with it, the cyclops prosecutor is wearing a barrister’s wig, common in the UK. Why did I put him in a barrister’s wig? I felt like it. πŸ™‚ Anyway, a brief little bit about true names: in many cultures, there is the name that your […]

524 – Was it her breath?

“But Rob,” I hear you think, “I’ve run paladins before that have gone to the Outer Planes and they didn’t attract any more attention than the attention they brought upon themselves. What gives?” Patience, Grasshopper. There is a reason πŸ™‚ In other news, this is the first strip to be drawn, inked and colored 100% […]

527 – Name Calling

In the D&D games I used to play in back in high school, there was a standing rule that if you called a god’s name often enough on the Outer Planes, they could hear it and might show up to both a) tell you to shut up, and b) unleash their holy wrath upon you. […]

530 – Grundahr Ghall

And now, in a continuing service, an entry from the Encyclopedia Ardrisia… Grundahr Ghall At the Dawn of Time, when the various gods gathered together at the Grand Conference to determine who was going to do what in the world, one of their number distinguished himself not by his power or wisdom, but by his […]

534 – Voerhal

I’m back. This past month has been the hardest I’ve ever gone through and I couldn’t have made it through without the support of my family, friends and my readers. From prayers and/or positive thoughts to the actual monetary donations to help pay for my father’s service, I am truly humbled by the love and […]

535 – Failed Spot Check

I’ve often seen Dhur as the kind of character made by someone who’s new to gaming and doesn’t understand how to allocate skills. DM: Are you absolutely sure you want to devote your last three skill points to Craft (needlepoint)? Player: I love needlepoint, yes! DM: Even though you’re going to be playing a Ranger […]

545 – Sub-Zero Throwdown!

For Dhur, being drunk while fighting might actually be an asset? I’ve been trying to veer away from really revealing blog posts lately, as I think they might put some people off, especially newer readers. However, something happened recently that I feel the need to talk about. This isn’t a set-up for a joke. You […]

557 – Special Delivery!

The holidays have come and gone and life is getting back to normal, or as normal as my life ever gets, at any rate.  We’re in the grips of 2016 now and as longtime readers know, 2015 really put me through the wringer. I’m glad to see its backside. Like everyone else I know, I’ve […]

558 – What’s on the menu?

You know how sometimes you might make a character in a RPG with a few skill points in an obscure skill, like Craft (Weaving) or Conversational Russian, just to see if the GM will incorporate that into the game somehow? You’re about to see that play out in the next strip. 😊 Something I’m trying […]

573 – A Kiss Goodbye

I guess this is what happens when you make an ice sculpture of someone (and then confess a longstanding crush). Believe it or not, it’s rather hard to draw people kissing, especially since it’s something I’d never drawn before. Y’see, it’s like there are two Robs in my head: Past Rob and Future Rob. Past […]

584 – Check yourself, Dhur

Look at it this way: if all your people were known for was overeating, running around barefoot, and hanging around with dodgy wizards, you’d be a tad defensive too. I’m a day late with this, but May 5th was and is a very important holiday in the history of the United States. I’m of course […]

590 – Vague Rewards ‘R’ Us!

After all the crap that’s been thrown at our little band o’ heroes, I thought some rewards were in order. Oh, and yes, Dhur was functionally illiterate (once he has something read to him, he’ll remember it, but otherwise…) He will probably use this new gift to find out just how much he’s been overcharged […]

593 – Home in Ruins

What a difference 3 months makes! Thank you all for the extraordinarily kind words during my hiatus/sabbatical/vacation/whatever you call it. I feel much better, less burned out, and ready to draw! I really needed that. πŸ™‚ So, who might that ghostly figure be? Take care, ~Rob

599 – MA!!!!

I’m really enjoying playing D&D again, after DMing for so long. Wanna hear about my character? SURE you do! πŸ™‚ I’m running a Human Diviner named Elias Banrion (Elias from the Prophet Elias, Banrion from the Irish for Queen, as in Ellery Queen – here’s who that is). Elias  (Eli to his friends) is a […]

601 – Yietzas!

Yes, in my world, magical clothing/armor have endure elements imbued in them. Why? Because comics, that’s why. πŸ™‚ This strip is going live on Election Day here in the US. Today is probably the most stressful election in decades for everyone, no matter what side of the fence you sit on. Like a lot of […]

603 – Mmmm, Ram Kebabs!

This cartoon is going live on Wednesday, November 23, which is the day before Thanksgiving here in the US. I know it’s a tad clichιd to talk about what you’re thankful for at this time of year, but here goes (I’ll make it short, I promise): I am thankful for my wife and my children, […]

605 – Divine 401K, anyone?

I’m pretty sure Becky knows how short the careers of most paladins are and the odds of collecting on any pension; she’s just grousing right now. I’ll be taking the next two weeks off for the holidays, so in the meantime, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, and Happy Holidays to any other holidays I […]

623 – Toots? Really?

Plus, Becky talks to her god and he talks back. She also has a puppy that has a history of eating entire inns. I am off for the Lone Star State as of July 4th, so my daughters (in their first airplane ride ever) may get to watch the fireworks from above! I plan on […]

625 – Reunited!

Man, you leave him unattended for two seconds… I’m seeing lots of “Doctor Who’s gonna be a WOMAN??? Nuh-uh! He’s a dude!” (or words to that effect) posts popping up on my Facebook feed, many by people that I ordinarily find to be progressive, rational people. My response? About. Frikkin’. Time. They made the Master […]

632 – DUERGAR!

Wow, Becky sure is ticked off! In other news… MEATSHIELD – YEAR EIGHT! Eight years ago today I launched Meatshield.net! Since 2009, a lot has happened, good and bad. I’ve met (via the Interwebs) a lot of great people, learned a great deal about being a cartoonist and a business owner (still working on that […]

633 – You gotta have faith!

This is the kind of thing that happens when your primary weapon is an intelligent magical artifact – every once in a while, it has something to say, and it’s usually something you don’t want to hear. I made this announcement earlier in the week on the MeatShield Patreon page, but realized that I should […]

659 – Malvat Magh

Wow. That’s pretty cold, Malvat, looting the body of one of your dead apprentices. Then again, what D&D player worth their salt hasn’t at least thought of looting their buddy’s corpse when their character dies? Ray: “You know, until you get raised from the dead, you’re not going to have much use for this Staff […]

664 – A Price Must Be Paid

Daaaang, son! Way to live your faith Leon! Hey, want to see what happens next? For $2 a month you can join the MeatShield Patreon community and get early access to the latest MeatShield comic, one week before the rest of humanity! That works out to about 7 cents a day – not too shabby! […]

673 – The MeatShield Primer!

Know someone who might like the strip but is intimidated by having to wade through 660+ strips just to get caught up? The MeatShield Primer is the perfect jumping-on point! Tell your family and friends! Post it on the social media outlet of your choice! Print it out and slap it up on game store […]

690 – It’s a FAKE!!!!

Becky is getting more patient – she would’ve kicked that guy’s butt for the “sweetcheeks” crack, and then we’d have three people in jail. BTW – I forgot to draw the white feather in the fourth panel. Let’s all just imagine that it’s there anyway. πŸ™‚ I meant to draw it, at any rate. ~Rob

693 – Smitty the Props Guy

Yes, the prop guy is missing fingers on his left hand. Name me a shop teacher who didn’t at least have part of a finger missing. Also, cedar may not be rare here, in the Real World, but in Ardris? Like Smitty said, that stuff ain’t cheap. In other news, I have just decided that […]